The Week of SUCK Running Continues

I really can’t blame fatigue or burnout this go round of marathon training.  If I was at week 15 of 16, YES.  Week 4 of 5?  Suck it up, Sally.

[ sidenote : can anybody explain to me why “Sally” is a nickname for “Sarah”?  Aren’t nicknames supposed to be shorter, or rhyme, or at least funny?  Don’t get it. ]

After Thursday’s Misery With Company run, I was feeling vengeful ‘ You stupid legs, I don’t have time for your slow nonsense!  And you, lungs, with your heart friend and all your blood pumping & O2 converting… you better get your shit together too.

So Friday night I had a punishment run planned.  Horseshit to whoever says running has to be fun – that’s how I was raised.  You suck?  You run.  At least then you’ll be sucky but fast.  I could actually hear my high school volleyball coach yelling to line up for wind sprints.

Also, yes, this is how I spend my Friday nights.  Keep the LOSER jokes to yourself, please.  We can’t all be as cool as you.

So I sat on the couch trying to get amped up and mentally prepared for the hell Mr. Treadmill was about to wreck on my life.  Grabbed some trail mix – you know, for fuel.

–  Turned on the Daniel Tosh stand up I didn’t finish the night before.  Dude is FUNNY.  Continued to eat trail mix.

–  B comes home, changes, immediately heads down to the gym.  I told him I’d meet him down there.

–  30 minutes later : Still sitting, still laughing, still eating the mix of the trail.

–  Finish trail mix.  Suddenly feel like vomiting.  Decide to change instead.  Put on my biggest tempos and my fat shirt.  Finally waddle down to treadmill.

In case you need translation, the first face says, “I really hate that I have to run right now.  And that now there’s no more trail mix.”  The second face has no translation because I was too ass-whipped to have anything smart alec-y to say.  Success.

Also, if you didn’t know, running sprints and climbing for a full mile (.5% incline every .1 miles = 5.0%) will cause an unfortunate case of cross-eyed-ness.  Don’t let that deter you though, it went away after a few hours.  (That shirt is still drying, however.)

After all that I was pretty jazzed to do some cross training today :

Weee! Grease face!

What did you say about my helmet? Nothing? Thought so.

Thanks to my padded diaper shorts and a gelly seat cover thing I can ALMOST get through a ride without my crotch/ass begging for mercy.  I guess if I REALLY wanted a punishment workout I could have gone out sans any of the above.  That’ll teach you a lesson alright…

16 miles tomorrow – last long run of 5W2M!  “Taper” will sort of happen during the week, then it’s LA Marathon time on Sunday!  I’ll let you know once I get past the denial stage how I really feel about it.

Sarah Soon-To-Be

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12 thoughts on “The Week of SUCK Running Continues

  1. I love the convo you had with your body parts/organs.

    Daniel Tosh is hilarious I still want to go see one of his shows.

    Hey no one said safetly had to look sexy. But you kinda look like Men in Black with the sunglasses so that’s good :)
    I want one of those laser thingys that make people forget what just happened.

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  2. Love your humor! So funny…as I was reading your post I was seriously munching on TRAIL MIX!! :)

    Doing a 16-18 miler tomorrow also…”LA HERE WE COME!!” Good luck tomorrow on your run and see you in LA!! :) :)

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  3. I obviously forgot that I ran a marathon a few months ago. Any milage higher than 13-15 seems insane to me. Good luck today!

    Oh, and I would feel the same way about running on a treadmill – gag me. I can’t do a step more than 5 miles on a treadmill.

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    • I bought the cheapest bike I could find online that didn’t come with streamers or training wheels – the Tour de France Stage One bike from meijer.com. $168.48 right now + looks like code “SPRING” gets you another 10% off. Shipping was like $20.

      I don’t know anything about cycling and I don’t plan to race, so I can’t tell you much about the ride or the quality or the anything like that. It looks sweet though, huh?

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  4. I’ve never heard sally as a nickname for sarah. that’s so bizarre. and how giant ARE those RNR Vegas race shirts?!?! What a bummer. I got an XS and I’m still a-swimmin’ in it. Ugh.

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