(this post brought to you (with edits) by rational, normal-thinking, pre-injured drama queen OUaL. you’re welcome!)
I’ve mentioned my Believe I Am Journal a few times now (Rache, how about blogging ABOUT journaling for narcissism! ;) ) , and figure I should give the story on what got the left brain data girl to pick up a pen and log the qualitative parts of running, instead of relying solely on the numbers.
(disclaimer : my spreadsheet is still alive and well, no worries)
When I got the email, initially I was all “F yes, Lauren Fleshman I love her!” And then I put my girlcrush card away and re-read what the “Sisters in Sport” project was all about – Putting big dreams on paper, crafting the blueprints to success, and sharing the journey.
you can’t see it, but the note is signed, “xoxoxo your biggest fan, LF”
Brake check. Time out.
Suddenly I was in that dream where you’re giving a speech in front of a crowd, and you’ve totally forgotten to put clothes on.
Naked dreams are horrifying.
The scary part wasn’t owning up to a goal(s) – obviously with the blog I’m ok with putting my goals (and their success/failure) out there for the public.
The part making my armpits sweat was actually reaching past that “attainable” level of goal-setting and admitting to wanting to go after something insane.
trying to ween myself off quantitative goals. got some work to do.
also please note “above average” = very subjective
Fear of failure has always plagued me – in running and life. Shying away from things I’m not good at (golf, cooking, cold calling at work), lowering expectations for workouts knowing I can blow the times out of the water (Margot will vouch), and retreating as soon as things stop going according to plan.
So forcing myself to admit to things only Imaginary Super Sarah of my Dreams might be able to accomplish? Putting goals down without first consulting McMillan to see “what I’m capable of”, or constructing a day-by-day plan to get there? Accepting that not every step will be victorious, that the PROCESS is just as important as the final result?
New territory for me.
But that’s the point – forget failure, dream big, go after something inconceivable. Dare yourself to be great. Take a chance. Cut the safety net.
I’ll be checking in and reporting (on those above and some numberless yet TBD goals) each month. If you’re interested in following along with the other Sisters in Sport, they’re linked HERE, and you can follow the #sistersinsport tag on twitter.
*note* NOT new ink. I didn’t brand myself in the name of this project, promise.
UPDATED :: A few “inside look” pics of the journal and its layout…