A Gift Guide for Everyone Shopping for Me

It’s crunch time and if you haven’t bought my Christmas present yet like I haven’t for any of the people on my list (procrastination station choo! choo!) you’re single digit days away from being in deep shit. To help you, I ditched the typical Blogger Gift Guide and made this wish list of things I’d be stoked to receive instead. DON’T SAY I NEVER DID ANYTHING NICE FOR YOU! It’s conveniently broken down by type and offers a variety of options for all levels of financial commitment or how much you love me, of which we could argue are or aren’t interchangeable but we don’t have time for such nonsense, so just go on ahead and pay the most attention to the right columns thanks. Pretty much everything is super reasonable.

You’re welcome, mom!

* Sarah OUaL’s Wish List for this Holiday or any Other Gift-Giving Occasion or Random Day When You’re Feeling Generous and Want to Buy Her Happiness With Material Things, Some of Which are Completely and Utterly Ridiculous, None of Which are Even Close to Necessary and Maybe You Should Just Get Her a Nice 6-Pack of Beer Instead *

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Picky Club (snacks+mail=smiles) $27-49/mo  |||  Why Do I Feel Like a Knock-kneed Buffalo When I Run Analysis from REP Lab $350  |||  All-Inclusive Running Vacation $2695 + air

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smiles are free :)  |||  Soleus Heart Rate Monitor $99  |||  Woodway Treadmill $11k (rain check substitute: a new car)

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GoPro Hero $130  |||  SUP Board $790  |||  Gibbs Quadski four wheeler/jetski hybrid for a measly $40k

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Brooks Vanguard $85  |||  these $580 velcros that look exactly like Fisher Price 1-2-3 skates  |||  Acton Rocket Skates – goodbye leg muscles! $700

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crew socks to keep my #inbend winter’y ankles warm $14-20  |||  Oiselle Yeti* $98  |||  D&G Wool Facemask Hat (balaclava, apparently) was $3245 now $1947!

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River Tube with cupholders $15  |||  insulated beer tote $25  |||  adorable teepee my dogs would never use (peepee-teepee joke here) $114  |||  GIANT BEAN BAG CHAIR $1150

* started this list before getting one. yeti is easily the most ridiculous and ridiculously awesome thing I own, and for that it’s staying on this composite list of ridiculousness. if you’ve got a spare hundo to toss around this is a cozy investment you won’t regret, maybe until you have to pee or accidentally go out in public in it.

** p.s.s. If you’re leaning towards Kicks please, please pick the 1-2-3’s

There you go. All the things I’d gift myself if money weren’t real and we didn’t have to buy a couch and mattress for the new place, and if Brian and I hadn’t just ordered our joint-gift KEGERATOR an hour ago. !!!

… What?? The couch and mattress can wait.

Who’s coming over for keg beer, river floating, and paddling this summer??

Spoiled OUaL

(pretty sure this post set an internet record for number of run-on sentences)

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